Always Remember Memories And Not Death

another day

another end of the day… I honestly don’t know what I did today. Lay here… I was too tired. I didn’t want to move. I just hoped you would come home. You are the only thing that I ever think about…. My mom posted this on my facebook today:

To Melissa, 

I Am Still Near ( By Oblate Missions)

Death has taken me from this world, and though we are apart, I am still near. All that we meant to each other remains true, in trust and faith, have no fear.
Keep me always close to your heart! For I leave with you what no one can steal, a treasure chest of precious, happy memories; the tender, love-filled moments we shared,as well as the challenging times that brought us closer together.
When you are in need, speak to me, call my name. I will come to you with wisdom and light; to fill your soul with peace, and to guide you in the pathways that lead to life forever with our Loving God.
I also offer you this sacred promise: when I am home in God’s embrace, whenever you call on me, I will still be present to you, for neither death nor grave can break the bonds of love that we on earth once knew. I namu babe…

Love, 
Armand Ray Atienza

Honestly, I wish these were your words……. I need you so much babe. The random flood of tears when I remember you’re gone; those tears hurt so much. I lose track of hours and days, I just realized it’s 2012 three hours ago. Everything that I was supposed to do was put on pause because you aren’t here. I remember what we were going to do the weekend before you passed away… I was going to have so much fun at my modeling class and we were going to party every weekend after that. There was my cousin’s birthday party, early Christmas, and then real Christmas, plus there was always new years for me to babysit you while you get wasted :P  ….. I’m so upset that none of the things that I wanted to go do with you are gone… ALL OF IT! IT’S ALL GONE… everything we wanted to do, all the promises, EVERYTHING…. it’s all…. it disappeared… it makes me so sad… I just need you back…  I love you baby and I always will.